Nothing Special
by ArmAndLeg
Summary: Zim nearly finishes something he had been working on for months. The something stirs up emotions in him one night, near its completion. The something happens to be a robot of Dib... Onesided SLASH ZimDib
1. "Nothing Special"

AN: An overactive imagination is what you guys need to worry about. I don't own, so don't sue. Happens BEFORE the episode "Future Dib" And the robot Dib…it may not have looked exactly like Dib in the episode, but I think Zim might have purposely messed it up AFTER he finished it, once he was going to use it so he could throw Dib off. 

Warnings: SLASHY THEMES…Zim/Dib to be exact!

Nothing Special

Zim looked down at the hard work he had in front of him. It took months, but now it would be almost complete. Almost because, well, it wouldn't have the conscious of a human mind. But at least it would be functional…at least he could use it for his own purposes. Those purposes involved spying and world domination, considering this was Zim we're talking about, but the robot in front of him had another purpose.

The robot before Zim was supposed to look, act, and basically BE the Dib-human. Zim knew that it would somehow come in handy in the future…maybe sooner than he would expect, but he knew he would use it. Though, it just wouldn't be the same as the Dib-human…since, naturally, it didn't have the same mind as the Dib-human. But Zim knew that his advanced studying skills would help him get the behavior of the Dib down, so he could use it in the near future to replace Dib.

Obsession was about to take on a new meaning, and Zim knew that if he studied Dib even more than he was now, he would soon start to notice things about the human that he was not supposed to know. Like the Dib's somewhat attachment to Torque… Zim shook his head; he would NOT think of that now. Not when success was only a few button pushes away.

But did he really want a fake Dib around in his house? The thought unnerved Zim, but also thrilled him at the same time. It would almost be like as if Dib was living with him. Appalled at his on train of thought, Zim shook his head to get rid of the images stored there. No! He would not give into some stupid human emotion…

Though, the emotion wasn't just a human one. Irkens fell in love too, and Zim knew it. He just didn't want to think about it. Somehow, he'd rather be blind to his emotions and go on fighting Dib ruthlessly, without ever ruing anything he had done to human. That was the way he fought best. That was also the way he could best ignore the Dib-human…and how adorable he looked when—

"Stop it!" Zim hissed to himself, looking away from the counter, away from the robot form of Dib. Great, this was not what he wanted once he finished the robot. It was only a robot—it was not meant to trigger his emotions. It wasn't supposed to make him think about Dib in ways that he should not have been thinking about in the first place…

Ugh! Whatever he did reminded him of the stupid Dib-human! Even that robot…there was more reason behind Zim's building it, and he knew it. He knew it because it was his desire to have something that reminded him of the Dib-human, but not in ways that caused him to curse the human's name. Somehow, he was going to have to forget. Had to forget about his feelings, his stupid emotions and give up the Dib. 

Zim would never have Dib, anyway, and he knew this. Knew this all too well. Maybe that was why he built the robot…so he could have something in Dib's likeness, but it just wasn't the same. It didn't provide the amusement that the real thing gave him. Sighing, Zim wondered if all his hard work was something he did to distract himself. He came to the conclusion that it wasn't. The only reason as to why he did build the spy 'bot was so that Zim could use it as a weapon…something to use against the real Dib.

Slowly, Zim walked away from the counter of his lab and over to the table where the robot lied, knowing that it couldn't react to anything just yet…since he hadn't activated it. Gingerly, he touched his handy work, almost entranced by it. It was almost perfect except…it just wasn't as beautiful as the real thing was. There was no life to it. It was just…a pile of simple machines used to build one complex one. That's all it was to Zim…and yet…

…It was also so much more to Zim. It was his testimony of love to Dib, somehow. Though, he hated himself for actually building it. He shouldn't have done so, and he knew it. All the robot would do was cause problems for him. Like now, for instance. If it weren't for the robot, he wouldn't be thinking about Dib. In fact, he would be busy planning new ways to get rid of the human. 

Zim sighed. Why did Dib have to be human? It was just…wrong, to him, somehow. Dib wasn't stupid like the rest of the godforsaken human race, and he definitely did not need to be treated the way he was. If only…if only Zim could actually say that to Dib…

"No," he whispered to himself. "The Dib-human must not know…must not suspect a thing about my true feelings for him…"

And that was what Zim kept telling himself, though he couldn't control the stares he was giving his own creation. The robot was just too much. How could he do such a thing like that to himself? Why tease himself with something as lifeless as a doll? Something that would not respond to the words, "I love you," like the REAL Dib-human would. 

Then again, Zim would never know how Dib would respond to such words…especially if they were to come from him, Dib's arch rival. Would never know, that is, unless Zim actually got the guts and told Dib. Zim knew it would never happen—he was too happy with trying to kill Dib…too happy with ignoring his own emotions, since they couldn't get in the way. 

That was how Zim wanted to be. He wanted to be completely alone, without emotions trying to weasel their way into his life. While he was on Irk, he never needed them, so why would he want them now? And why would he have feelings for the Dib-human, anyway? Dib was just what he was! A human! There was nothing special about him! Nothing special at all…

"Nothing special," Zim grunted, snatching his hand away from the cold robot in front of him. He had been absently stroking its cheek while he was thinking. Glancing back at the image of Dib in front of him, Zim sighed and tried to think of something else. He had to convince himself once again that Dib was nothing special. That he was just a puny human…and only a tool, a stepping stone in his destruction of Earth.

Besides, these…emotions…Zim had for Dib…they had to be temporary. They just couldn't be the real. Couldn't be how Zim would feel for the human for the rest of his time here on Earth. Because once the Earth was destroyed, the Dib-human would be with the rest of the human race—gone. That was all Zim wanted when he arrived on the planet, and that was all he was going to get from it. He would not take a human back to Irk…not no way, not no how.

__

Forget about the Dib-human, a voice hissed in the back of Zim's mind. _He'll only cause you trouble if you continue to think that you love him._ Zim believed that voice—he always had. At the rate things were going for him, if Zim let the human distract him any longer, the Earth's fate would slowly slip through his fingers. That was something he definitely did not want. He had to prove himself to the Tallests, and Zim wasn't about to let some petty emotions get in his way.

His resolve hardened. Yes…he would forget about his emotions for the Dib-human. In fact, he would come up with a plan to get rid of him, once and for all! Deep down inside, though, Zim knew he would probably never be able to completely live out his threats to kill Dib. But he had to forget…had to keep on believing that he hated Dib, and that he would never, _ever_ feel anything for the human.

At least, while in the presence of the human. He could, if he wanted, go through moments where he would actually admit what he felt for Dib…but only to himself. No one but him was to know that he was harboring feelings for a sad, pathetic Earth-monkey. 

And maybe, one day, Zim would grow more comfortable with his feelings. No matter, he was still going to feel them. He could ignore them all he wanted; they would always be there. His emotions would haunt him, try to get him to see the truth, to give up his mission so he could be happy. But his life was his mission, and he couldn't give up his mission for something as simple as love. Love was stupid, and it was definitely not something that would make him happier than completing his mission.

Or would it make him happier? Zim cursed to himself as he thought that. Of course it wouldn't make him happier! He would always know that he let go of his mission, his _life_, for something that shouldn't exist in his world, anyway. Knowing that would make him uncomfortable…feel as if was really as incompetent as people—no, his _race_—made him out to be. He would not give them the satisfaction of him giving up!

So his mind came across two things…two things to make a decision over—Dib, or his mission. Dib, like Zim had decided before, was nothing special. Sure, Dib might have been the thing that Zim loved, but…his mission always won the war. It was how he was taught: The mission always came first, then personal pleasures. And Zim considered Dib to be a personal pleasure.

With that in mind, Zim looked at the robot in front of him. Yes, he would use it, but only when he needed it. Only when the robot was needed in order for him to complete his mission, he would use it. Even if it ended up backfiring. Maybe…maybe he would be able to flatter Dib somehow with how easily he had created a lifeless doll in Dib's likeness…if Dib were to see it, that is. 

Slowly, Zim walked away from the table and into his own little room of his lab. Yawning, he relaxed into a chair. He could think about this tomorrow. He could think about Dib, who was nothing special. He could at least think, then, without any thought interrupting how he was supposed to view the Earth and its inhabitants.

All he would have to know tomorrow is that Dib was nothing special, just a stupid human trying to get along on his planet… Just a stupid human with bright amber eyes…a nice smile…and—Zim cut himself off from thinking anything further. Sleep was needed now, and thinking about Dib would only keep him awake. Yes…Dib was nothing special…unless Zim was alone in his lab, finally admitting otherwise to himself.

If only he could actually say anything to the Dib-human about it… If only he could actually tell Dib that he really wasn't nothing special…but that he was special… Even if Zim only thought that Dib was special when he was completely lost as to what he should really feel. Then again, right now, and probably for the rest of his life, Dib would always be nothing special, and only nothing special…until Zim could forget about his mission…

It would be nice if you were to review! It was rather late when I wrote this (and right after the new eps of IZ, too. XD), but it makes sense! At least, I hope it does! I hope you guys enjoyed it, too. ^_^


	2. 

AN: ::shrugs:: I was just rereading "Nothing Special," and I got an idea for another chapter. Inspiration works in strange ways, no? I had intentionally meant "Nothing Special" to remain a one-shot…but life doesn't always work out that way. This chapter takes place AFTER "Future Dib," so Dib knows of the robot-Dib…and he was released from the cage with the monkey before he turned into an old man… Jeez. I have to clear everything up for the slow ones, don't I? No offense, I'm a slow person myself…had to remind myself that Dib was released before the real ending of "Future Dib" as I wrote this, so…

Warnings: Slash themes, my friends. Zim/Dib, somewhat one-sided… (you'll understand once you read)

Disclaimer: Sorry Jhonen for twisting your characters like this… I'm trying to be more and more in-character as I write these fics…while convincing people I don't OWN IZ…because you do, Jhonen, and I adore you. ::bows::

"Harsh Reality"

Zim knew he had the upper hand when he pinned the young human underneath him. After all, he _did_ have enough military training in order to get a human under him. His thoughts were becoming distracting, though, but Zim ignored them.

"What…did you say about me, stink-beast?" Zim growled, leaning in close to Dib. Dib struggled beneath him, and Zim couldn't help but to like the feel of Dib under him. Silently, Zim cursed himself for thinking such things at a time like this; his pride was at stake!

"I just said…that maybe there was another reason behind that…robot you made of me…" Dib gasped for air as Zim continued to choke him unintentionally.

"There was no other reason!" Zim shouted, trying to keep himself from panicking; his grip loosening as he did so. "What makes you think there was another reason? You're obviously stupider than I imagined if you think so, Dib!" He tried to cover his panic; had to make sure Dib didn't see through him.

"Why are you…getting so worked up…Zim?" Dib asked between gasps, smirking at Zim even though Zim could see the pain in his eyes. 

"Because I don't want you thinking something that was obviously not the case!" Zim's tone gave away a lot, and Zim cursed himself at that. Damnit, the Dib-human knew too much! That thought caused Zim to tighten his hold around Dib's neck. He seemed oblivious to Dib's gagging and gasping for air.

"Why…why did you…build it?" Dib asked, his pained expression compelling Zim to loosen his hold once again. Why did Zim have to hurt Dib like this? _Because he's nothing special_, Zim's mind hissed.

"To get rid of you! To get rid of the human race! I came here to destroy the Earth and that's exactly what I'll do!" Zim responded heatedly, pinning Dib down even worse than before, slowly letting go of Dib's neck.

"Why…do you have to…get rid of me?" Dib asked as he hungrily sucked in air. Zim looked away from Dib before glaring at the human, his claws now back around Dib's neck, but not strangling him.

"Because you'll only mess up my mission!" Zim shrieked. "I can't lose this mission…"

"But…is the mission all you want in life?" Dib continued to inquire, looking up at Zim with an expression Zim could not describe. All Zim knew was the funny leap his Irken equivalent of a heart did when Dib looked at him like that.

"My mission _is_ my life!" Zim cried in response. "There is nothing else I have to live for!" Zim continued, glaring at Dib and inwardly glaring at himself. How could he lie so easily? _He's nothing special,_ his mind reminded him, _so forget about him._ Yes! Yes, he would forget all about the Dib-human! In fact, he'll kill him right now!

But Zim just couldn't bring himself to.

And Dib seemed to notice that. "If there really is…nothing else to live for, then you could just kill me now and get it over with," Dib said, wincing slightly as Zim continued to glare at him, Zim's claws remaining around his neck. "Plus…don't Irkens fall in love, too?" Dib screamed in pain as he was swiftly kneed in the groin.

"Irkens do not need such a primary emotion!" Zim shouted more to himself than at Dib. Wincing again, Dib tried to move out from under Zim, seeming to know he had said the wrong thing to the Irken. "I would never fall in love! It's only a distraction! A distraction I must get rid of; just like how I need to get rid of you, Dib!" Zim realized his mistake the second the words left his mouth.

Horrified, Zim noticed the strange look Dib was now giving him. "You…love someone…Zim?"

"Never!" Zim protested, snarling, his grip now tightening on Dib's neck. "It's only a distraction! It's a stupid emotion, one I do not need in order to survive, unlike you humans…" he was getting too unsure of himself, and Zim knew Dib could tell. Damn the human! Just kill him now, he pleaded with himself. He just couldn't though, even if he was choking Dib at the moment.

"Everyone…needs love, Zim," Dib responded.

"Irkens do _not_ need!" Zim continued. "Continue to blab, human, and I _will_ kill you."

"Somehow I don't…think you can," Dib whispered, smirking up at Zim. Growling, Zim finally forced himself to choke the human with all his strength.

"Damnit, Dib-human! Just because I love you doesn't mean I won't kill you!" Zim hissed, his teeth bared in a snarl. Somehow, though, Dib had found a way to free his arms out from under Zim and tried to pull Zim's claws away from his neck. "I'll kill you for every time you've mocked me! Every time you ruined my plans! For…for causing me to love you…" Zim felt the tears sting at his eyes, but he ignored them. The human deserved to die, and to die now.

Rid himself of distractions had been his goal, and Dib was distraction number one. So what if he had feelings for Dib?! The human was nothing special! Zim didn't need him…and the human certainly didn't need Zim. Suddenly, Zim realized what he had told Dib and let go of him in shock. "Good Irk, no, I didn't!" Zim growled to himself. 

Dib's pained, yet surprised expression told him otherwise as he stopped struggling under Zim. Zim's already wide eyes grew wider a Dib just lied under him, unmoving. Had Zim finally killed him? Was the human now dead? Zim's breath grew erratic as he suddenly realized that the human had been lying still for far too long, then Dib blinked then coughed for air.

Zim had neither been so terrified nor relieved in his entire life. Slowly, Dib blinked at him, almost too weak to move anymore than that; but Zim knew. Knew that Dib had heard him, and was no trying to process what he had been told. Should he run before Dib even asked? Or should be finish killing the human now and get it over with, never to hear Dib's voice again? 

Despite the questions going on his mind, Zim did something that shocked him and Dib both. Leaning in even closer than he had before, Zim softly kissed Dib, almost as if asking for the human's forgiveness through the kiss. Dib instantly tensed under him and didn't respond to the kiss; just as Zim had expected him to, but it was all right. He knew Dib could never love him back since the day he realized his feelings.

Once Zim ended the kiss, he felt ashamed of himself. He just kissed a human! He was supposed to have _killed_ the human, not kiss him! Dib was nothing special, Zim continued to tell himself. How could he betray himself like this? _How?_

"Zim…?" Dib's voice interrupted his inner rant, causing Zim to look at the human, seeing the shock…but no disgust…in Dib's eyes. Why…why wasn't he disgusted? Zim asked himself. Dib sighed, weak yet gaining strength. "Zim…do you really…love me?"

The human only continued to look at him with those pleading eyes, but Zim refused to give him an answer. Instead, Zim looked away from Dib, almost tempted to get off of Dib and let him go. _He's nothing special, forget about him_, his mind repeated, but he ignored that, too. Zim turned and gave Dib his best glare. "I hate you; you're a distraction, a stupid stink-beast like the others. Loving you is simply out of the question, human," Zim growled.

"But…you do, anyway," Dib responded, rubbing his neck where Zim's claws used to be. "And you…kissed me, Zim."

"Leave me alone!" Zim shrieked, placing his claws over his antennae. Block Dib out, block Dib out, block Dib out, he thought to himself. He just couldn't though…not when Dib was under him like this. Couldn't Dib just have kicked him off by now? It would have made sense for Dib to do that…but he hadn't done anything.

"Zim…" Dib sighed, causing Zim to look at him even though he didn't want to. "Why me?"

Shocked, Zim's arms fell to his sides. Unable to respond, Zim just looked at Dib desperately. That was the question Zim had never asked himself; he didn't know how to answer. And why was Dib acting like this? Shouldn't Dib be disgusted that he, Zim, loved him?

"There…has to be a reason, Zim…" Dib continued. "You just wouldn't…fall for a human like…like myself," he mumbled, turning his head so that he was looking away from Zim.

"You're too young to understand," Zim said, his voice unusually soft as he forced himself off of Dib. He needed to get away from the human; Dib was distracting him again. Why did the human have such a hold on him? "You're only a fraction of my age, Dib…"

"That…may be so, Zim," Dib whispered, sitting up for the first time in what seemed to be hours, but was only fifteen or so minutes. "But I know you well enough to know you don't know why you love me…" Dib stated, his voice stronger.

"Go, Dib," Zim hissed, glaring at Dib. "You don't love me back; you _can't_ love me back," Zim's voice was hard and final. "Forget I ever said anything to you…because you'll only be nothing special to me." 

"How can I be 'nothing special' when you love me?" Dib asked, raising an eyebrow.

Zim growled. "Don't question me, human! Leave my lab, your presence disturbs me."

"Whatever, Zim," Dib said, standing up. Zim stood up as well; he had to make sure Dib did leave, anyway. There was no way he would just let the human wander around his lab, anyway. He was shocked when Dib turned to face him, moving closer to Zim. "Does this change anything between us, Zim?"

"No," Zim growled, defensive. He didn't like the look the human was giving him, nor did he liked the fact that Dib moved closer to him still. What did Dib think he was doing? Dib was too young to know anything; he was still just a child, and Zim knew this. Knew this so well that it unnerved him that he fell for a growing human.

"I think it does, Zim," Dib responded. "Thanks…for not killing me. Man, did I think I was goner!" Dib shuddered, then leaned against Zim. "I may be young, Zim…but maybe, when I'm older… I'll grow to love you." With that, Dib kissed Zim clumsily on the lips before turning away.

"You do know the way out of my lab, right?" Zim asked, keeping his emotions under control.

"Yeah… I won't take pictures this time, I promise."

"Dib-human…promise never to stop chasing me, because I'll always try to destroy the Earth. Doing so is my mission, and my mission comes before any of my own emotions," Zim stated, his voice stronger, now sounding sure of himself.

"Alright, Space-boy. You won't ever destroy it! I'll make sure of that," Dib said, turning to grin at Zim before turning about around and walking out of the lab.

"Awww…why did you let the Dib-human go, Master?" Gir asked, walking up to Zim.

"Because I had to…for the mission's sake. He's really nothing special, though," Zim responded, though his mind told him otherwise.

"Oh…are you and him gonna make any mo' kissy faces? I like kissy faces!" Gir shrieked, grinning widely and throwing his arms up in the air. "'Specially the ones on TV!"

Zim just shook his head and looked away from where Dib stood moments ago, still feeling the brush of Dib's lips against his. Didn't the human understand Zim would never let the human love him? Didn't the human know he would eventually get around to destroying the Earth? Then again, that would probably only happen if Dib gave up.

Which, Zim noted, was something Dib would never do. Zim was glad for that…glad that Dib had at least tried to understand him. Maybe…maybe he could let the human love him…maybe he could destroy the Earth and keep Dib for himself….

No, that would never work and Zim knew that. The Dib-human loved his planet and would protect it with his life. That was why Dib could never love him; Dib would have to choose between the Earth or Zim, and Zim already made his decision on his mission or Dib. The mission came first, always had and always will. For Dib, Zim knew, that the Earth came first. It was a harsh reality, but Zim grew used to it.

He just hoped that Dib would be able to handle the harsh reality when it finally came crashing down upon the young human's shoulders. If not, then Zim would help Dib come to terms with hard reality. If and until that happens, Zim would continue to believe that Dib was nothing special.

It was the only way he could deal with harsh reality on his own.

Ahhhh. Well, I'm CERTAIN that "Nothing Special" is done now… At least, I sure hope I don't get any more ideas for it. O_o That would be just creepy if I continued to get ideas for this fic ever week or so… Creepy in a good kind of way, I guess. ^_^;;


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